I had so many mixed feelings today. This morning Mom called to say that Dad had a bad night and was in a lot of pain. They wanted Wil to stop in and see if he should go to the Hospital for Morphine. I quickly called Monica to say that I couldn't watch the boys and headed for Mom and Dad. Wil still had to finish getting ready for work. I gave Dad pain medication as soon as I got there. Carol and Wil both got there before his pain subsided. I made several calls to Home Health and the Cancer Center Nurse. They talked about Dad in their morning conference and agreed that it is time to put Dad in the Hospice Program. I went into Goshen to get Morphine and while I was waiting for for it, I got a call from the Hospice Nurse. It was decided to give the other pain med every 4 hours before we give the strong medication that I just picked up. This new one, would probably have him sleeping most of the time. Today he did ok with taking something every 4 hours.
Back to my mixed feelings. Throughout the day, I was reminded that this is really real, my Dad really isn't going to be here much longer. 10 months ago we admitted Wil's Mom into Hospice, and now here we are at it again with my Dad. It's a great program and I'm grateful for it.
It's tough to see Dad becoming so frail, and seeing him in so much pain. It's also hard to see Mom struggle and hearing her wonder what she will do without Dad.
I pray God, that you will keep Dad from suffering and that you will grant his request and soon take him home, where he can have complete healing. May this journey peaceful. As my tears flow, I ask that you place a hedge of protection around him and our family, guard our hearts and give us peace. Amen
